A Birthday Latte

Birthdays always make me cry. Not my own of course, I'm already planning a big party for my 40th next year. It's my kids birthdays that get to me. If I slow down to take in the moment when we sing happy birthday to one of them, I'll tear up despite the chaos of lots of not so little kids excited about yet another birthday party. Since my girls' birthdays are only 3 days apart in May, we always have a big party weekend during which we get all of our celebrating done. Mason always feels a little left out of all of this since his birthday isn't till July. Here is the result, he starts planning 2 months in advance. By the time we finished our family celebration last night (with another krispy kreme doughnut cake), I was ready for Mason's 9th birthday-palloza to come to an end. I get it, my first-born is growing up.

Earlier this summer (yes, I realize that my last blog was spring-break), we went to Chicago. While there, we took the kids to Navy Pier and to the Children's Museum there. It's possible that it was our last visit to a Children's Museum, Mason was too old for many of the activities and quickly bored by others. I also felt like my kids were among the some of the older ones playing in the children's area at the Botanical Gardens last week. I felt a little bit of longing for simpler times as I watched the young moms chasing their 2 and 3 year old children around. Not that I want to go back, but at 5, 7, and 9, my kids are no longer babies by any measure.

It's all changing as it does every year. My kids have strong opinions which is good, I guess, and it keeps me on my toes. Still, watching them grow-up is bittersweet. There are times when I'm no longer their favorite person, and they don't need my help the same way they once did - not that I wish they still needed me to dress, change, and feed them, but at times I wish they would let me put them in the clothes I pick out. I guess that for now, I'll just keep drinking my venti, soy, iced lattes from Starbucks and try to enjoy each day - even the frustrating ones.

A Dandelion Latte

Spring Break 2011 has come and gone. I had big plans (as always) for trips to the zoo and museums, maybe an outing to the Botanical Gardens. The break got off to a fantastic and early start with our long weekend at the beach in Naples, FL. After a 1400 mile round trip, our new Volvo is officially broken in. We had a lovely few days with great friends we rarely see. As is often the case, I seem to be the only one who missed a few spots with the sunscreen. We returned home literally minutes before a terrible spring storm that uprooted trees and knocked out power for days in some very nearby neighborhoods.

On Wednesday of Spring Break week, the kids and I opted to take a walk to a nearby park that Mason & Charlotte like to call "Charson Lake." It is conveniently located right next to Starbucks and the book store. It was a beautiful day for a walk, and our little adventure took up most of the afternoon. Thanks to a neighbor who was out working in his yard, we also got a little gardening lesson and my children experienced the novelty of dialing a number on an old fashioned rotary phone. Of course, we also picked up a latte and a few new books for all. Along the way, in typical 4 year old fashion, Mary Jane stopped to pick every dandelion she saw so that she could blow the seeds off of it.

Don't get me wrong, of course I would have loved spending the entire week at the beach, but since that wasn't an option, at least I realized, once again, that we don't need big activities to have a great spring afternoon. Take some time to pick a dandelion while you're on your way to get a latte.

A Latte of Advice

I use to read parenting books and magazines. When Mason was little, I would read all sorts of things trying to make mental notes to remember when he was older. Then he did get older - I hate that he keeps doing that. For about a year after Mary Jane was born, when Charlotte & Mason were 2 and 4, I was in survival mode. I was exhausted, and I realized that reading beauty tips for moms and ways to make healthy snacks from scratch just made me want to cry. I was lucky to get a shower and 3 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

I cancelled my subscription to Parents Magazine because I couldn't take the guilt. I read about all of the things I wasn't doing to be a good mother, and it made me feel terrible. Somehow, we all survived, and even thrived. Now that they are (yikes) 4, 6, and 8, I'm entering a new stage in parenting. Rob & I are raising a little boy who is so much like us that sometimes we have a hard time communicating with one another. I'm learning that I can't and shouldn't try to control so much of my children's lives. Some of the advice is actually helping us have a calmer, happier home.

There is still guilt. While I am trying to "celebrate calm" with "love and logic" (2 current preferred parenting methods around here, I still run into moments when I have no idea what to do. I told Mason that he is my guinea pig for parenting. He told me that I didn't learn anything about raising girls who like American Girl Dolls from him. We have our moments. My advice is not to listen to too much advice. I've found that escaping to Starbucks really helps as well.

A New Car Latte

I guess the first rule of a latte and a new car is to watch out for spills. As much as I enjoy the aroma of a good latte, the new car smell is pretty great, too. Yes, we got a new car. It's a beautiful new Volvo XC90, and we finally have a 3rd row. The kids are thrilled, we'll see if they still love it after we drive to Chicago and back in June.

We still have our faithful 4 Runner. It's still going strong at 105 thousand miles, and it is now Rob's primary vehicle. It has been a great car, and I even wrote a latte about it last year. Here it is...

I recently rolled past 90,000 on my 2003 Toyota 4 Runner. Those miles all belong to this family, and I couldn't help reflecting a little on where we've been on our journey.

We bought the car brand new about a week before Mason's 1st birthday. We needed 4 wheel drive for Colorado, and we needed a place to put both a carseat and an excited 80 pound dog. 2 weeks after we got it, we took a 2 week road trip that started in Denver and included stops in Atlanta, Hilton Head, Boone NC, Ohio, and the Twin Cities to name a few spots. As a doting first-time Mommy, I spent much of that trip riding in the back seat so that I could entertain Mason who was still rear-facing in his carseat. Over the next 2 years, while still in Denver, we took trips to Vail, Aspen, Mount Rushmore, and Jackson Hole. Our sweet dog Sadie took her last ride in the back of the 4 Runner, and her nose prints were on the back windows for a long time after she was gone.

Once we moved back to Atlanta (loading up the top carrier for the ride), we soon added the third carseat to the back. Our kids don't have lots of extra space, but they do now have a DVD player for long car rides such as our annual trips to Hilton Head and Ohio, and 2 trips last year to Washington DC with a side trip to New York City.

All of those big trips add up to alot of miles, but most of the miles are probably from trips to the mall, doctors, karate classes and ballet, the zoo, and botanical gardens, and, of course, the coffee drive-through. In other words, everyday life with 3 kids who are getting bigger by the minute.

I realize that 90,000 isn't a huge milestone (hopefully) for vehicles these days. We're planning on keeping our 4 Runner for as long as we possibly can. It's not the greenest car out there, but at 25 miles a gallon on the highway, it's not a bad way to get my crew around town. My latte today came to me as I drove around town drinking a latte, take a break from all of the chaos of the holidays to reflect on your journey - and don't forget to buckle up for the ride.

Snowed In

One week, a whole week of snow days. This is unheard of in Atlanta, but here we are getting ready for a week off of school which will be followed by a 3 day weekend. Like most moms around me, I am in full-on survival mode. It has helped that we didn't lose power, and Rob has been able to get out to restock our kitchen with milk, bread, and take out bbq.

Here are a few other items that I realize are a necessity if you happen to find yourself snowed in with 3 active kids for an entire week just one week after Christmas break:

1. Sleds - Rob managed to snag a few from the hardware store before the snow and ice hit

2. Coffee - lots of it

3. Neighbors with kids - so soon after Christmas break, my kids needed more than just each other to play with

4. Facebook friends - Social networking is a great thing, and many other Atlanta moms have been online to share in the fun and pain of this week at home

5. A husband who is willing to get out and about

6. Video games - the Wii was a huge help this week, we could only stay out sledding on ice for so long

7. Patience - mine is starting to wear thin

Finally, when everyone feels up to it, you should go out for a latte! The walk to our local Starbucks was a welcome outing this afternoon!

A Traditional Latte

It's Christmas Eve, that means that we're getting ready for our traditional Christmas Eve bowling outing. Technically this is only the second year that we've gone, but it's a tradition in the making. The kids will also get to open their traditional Christmas Eve gifts tonight - pajamas, a book, and a new ornament. With 3 kids each getting a new ornament each year, I'm going to need a second Christmas tree soon. Tomorrow I will break out my fine china for the annual Christmas brunch, a sausage, egg, cheese casserole with fruit and ham on the side. Grandparents, Aunts, and possibly great-grandparents will join us for that portion of the day. It's the one time of the year that I use the fine china. And one of the few times that I cook if the truth be told.

These are all traditions that I have created and for my little family. None of my kids actually eat the brunch casserole that I make each year, and Mason would rather pick the gift under the tree of his choosing to open instead of pajamas on Christmas Eve. My dishes have to all be washed by hand. Still, I'm hoping that these traditions will continue. Maybe one day my kids will start to like my holiday food. It's possible that they will grow up with a different view of our holiday family traditions than mine, and that's alright. I'm trying to be flexible (it's not always easy - but that's another story).

For now, I'll just say - traditional or not - enjoy your holidays! I thrive on the chaos of Christmas, and love that it's an over-the-top kind of day for us. Some people enjoy a quiet day or a nice vacation from it all. Now I'm off to find an outfit that goes well with bowling shoes!

A Status Latte

This is isn't a superior latte by any means. Although, I did have an exceptionally good non-fat vanilla chai latte from my favorite local coffee spot, Octane, today. They make their own vanilla, yum! Today's latte is actually about my status, specifically my status updates on Facebook for the year. Let me start by saying that I have been home with sick children for over a week now. I'm getting a little stir crazy, and, as usual, spending more time than I should on my laptop.

As a rule, I ignore all of the applications, games, etc on Facebook, but I could not resist this year-end one that I saw on a friend's page. It creates a collage from random status updates (somehow chosen by this app) which you have posted over the course of the year. I enjoyed my look back so much, that I decided to post it here since some of 3 or 4 readers do not spend any time on Facebook. Here is a latte to go along with this, take a moment (or a week if you're home with sick kids) to reflect on your year. Look at old pictures, journals, or status updates, and appreciate all you and your family have done...

My Year in Status Updates:

loves that it was nice enough weather to stay outside for a while after school before the low 40s and rain move in for the end of the week and weekend once again * Why does Valentine’s Day feel like the new Halloween at school? We really don’t need all of that candy. * “There’s something about the Southland in the springtime...” * Orange bandana for my Grounded Kid - if you know my kids you can guess which one that is. *might be developing an ebay habit, don’t tell Rob * my 7 year old used air quotes to emphasize a sarcastic remark to me. He actually used them correctly, too. * Starbucks should offer delivery to people who are stuck at home with sick kids and who have broken espresso machines. * Mason quote of the day “I love April Fool’s Day! You can tell lies all day and not get in trouble.” * June 2006 - the wait began; Summer 2009 - #62 on the waiting list; Summer 2010 - we’re in. Venetian Pool, here we come! * Mary Jane to me at 10 this morning, “Mommy, I didn’t just eat a cookie. It looks like a cookie and tastes like a cookie, but it’s not a cookie.” * We made it - 4 adults, 3 children, 2 laptop DVD players, 1 top carrier on the rented Tahoe. Houston and back in less than 5 days, Uncle D is now a married man! * Is it ok to recycle Corona bottles with the lime stuck in them? * They call it the Magic Kingdom for a reason! Great trip but the bar has now been set pretty high for summer fun, and we’re only 2 days into summer vacation. * “Way up on Lookout Mountain, there’s a camp that’s really swell...” * Back from a weekend at a place that might be more magical than the Magic Kingdom! * MJ and I just looked through Mason’s baby book (volume 1). I realized 2 things, 1. I’ve got to get a baby book put together for each of my girls one of these days & 2. Sadie was a huge dog (75 pounds) to have next to such a little guy for his first few years. * Thinks I might just stay in Sea Pines forever. And I just said goodnight to my 7 year old little boy for the last time, he’ll wake up as an 8 year old. * You know you’re a grown-up when you get really excited about a new vacuum cleaner * If the chocolate is from Whole Foods, does that mean it’s a little healthier? * Surprise tickets to the opening night of Cirque de Soleil, a great way to celebrate 10 years of marriage! * DHHS grads - we’re everywhere! * Considering I’ve been house bound all week with a sick child (2 sick children today and one more who is still sleeping), I’m thinking my house should be much cleaner than it is.

An Over-committed Latte

Parent involvement is a great thing. One of the truly fabulous things about my kids' elementary school is that the parents often fill in the gaps left by public school bureaucracy to get things done. There's just one thing, if you're a parent at the school and you give a hint that you might have a few free hours one morning a week or a special interest in something, they'll ask you to volunteer away all of your free-time.

Being a parent volunteer starts early. When my kids were very little and I was sleep deprived and desperate for adult interaction, I did things like coordinate our weekly playgroup. Then came preschool. The opportunities for volunteering as a preschool mommy can be overwhelming to say the least but also fun and rewarding if you find the right committees. Then you're ready for elementary school. I am a good target, I'm very social and enjoy working with groups of other moms. Lots of moms are very good at the juggling required to get it all done - they have lists and calendars and yahoo! groups. I have a hard time even keeping up with email these days much less a calendar or three.

With Mary Jane only in pre-k, I have many years left to volunteer at school, but, this fall, I'm feeling like I've already reached my limit. I still haven't typed up the minutes from the last PTA meeting which I need to do since I'm secretary, and I spent too much time to count getting wrapping paper delivered to the right students since I'm in charge of that fundraiser. I am in awe of the people who somehow manage to take on much more than I have, and they seem to do it with ease. I am also developing a new respect for those moms who have no problem saying no. Signing up to be a co-Daisy Scout Troop leader for Charlotte has turned into way more commitment than I bargained for, but I think I'm in it for the long-haul now.

Here's my latte for all you volunteer moms, take five minutes and drink a latte before you say "yes". Is it something that you or your children will really enjoy? Charlotte is thrilled about scouting which is why I said yes to that one. While joining a committee can be a great way to meet people, it's not a good idea to join just for the social aspect. Real work will probably follow. Then you might feel guilty if you're not giving it 100%. If you want to get together with other moms, just make plans, and it is amazing how much fun it can be to go out without an agenda or to-do list in front of you. Now I'm off to type up those minutes.

"I have a photograph..."

In high school I listened to a wide range of music - Billy Joel, REM, Indigo Girls, James Taylor, 10,000 Maniacs, Bon Jovi. The list goes on and also includes Simon & Garfunkel. They had a great little song called Bookends which contains the line "Time it was and what a time it was, I have a photograph. Preserve your memories..." I've had that line stuck in my head all day.

Today is the day I finally began to tackle the huge box of pictures from the last 5 years that has been growing in the basement. Mason's baby book ends around age 2, but it does take up 2 volumes with captions for all of the big events. The girls each have a handful of photos thrown into an album, I feel a little guilty about that. I actually put off getting a digital camera until Mason turned 1. I wanted to have pictures to hold and save. I was worried that if I went digital I wouldn't have anything to put in albums.

Turns out, I still have quite a few printed pictures to sort through. For now at least, I have decided to forgo the individual albums and just get the pictures into some sort of order. What works best for me is to put pictures from one event together with a caption, and not worry too much about chronological order. I am going to devote one album to birthday parties, my sorting revealed some gaps in prints so I will spend some time in the coming days sorting through Snapfish in hopes that I can find missing parties.

Here's my picture sorting latte - first, have a latte to keep you going while you sort. Then make sure you have the time and space to spread out for a while without any small folks coming and trying to "help". Then get ready for a trip down memory lane, you'll be singing "... I have a photograph, preserve your memories..." for hours after.

Queen for a Day (again)

This is a recycled latte from last year. One great thing about The Melon Festival in Milan, Ohio (my husband's hometown) is that pretty much all of what I said last year still rings true this year. As I sit here with the giant stuffed animal my father-in-law won for me at skee ball, we are all exhausted from the weekend fun, and I think I gained five pounds from the festival food. It was fabulous, and here are last year's observations...

I like to refer to Atlanta as a small town, but we all know that it's not. My husband, on the other hand, is from a true small town. A tiny little town in Northern Ohio, population about 1200. We just spent Labor Day weekend there with family as we have many times in the past.

Like many very small towns, I've learned, they have one weekend a year for some type of festival. In Rob's hometown, Labor Day weekend is the Melon Fest. Since I grew up in Atlanta, I never got to experience these festivals as a child. I think I missed out, and I can understand why our kids ask to go every year. There are carnival rides, games where you can pay $3 to win a plastic or stuffed prize, and festival food which is the best - brats, fries, tacos, funnel, cake, and the BEST corn on the cob I've ever tasted (sweet corn for those Ohio natives). Not to mention the cantelope and watermelon ice cream.

And then there is the parade. In all the years I've attended the festival, at least 5 now, I've been to the beer tent and two bars many times, but I've never made it to the parade until this year. Here's what I found out, each town in the area has some sort of festival during the summer, and at each of these events a queen is chosen. That queen then gets to go ride in a convertible or float at all of the other local parades. I'm pretty sure that Charlotte thought she was watching a parade filled with live princesses waving right at her. To top things off, almost everyone hands out candy as they pass by.

I don't know that I have a latte from all of this, it's more of a shout-out to the joys of small town America. I'm glad it's an experience my kids get to enjoy. I have quite a bit of fun myself, and even if they don't sell lattes from a booth at the festival, the corn on the cob is really out of this world!